Waiting

After two of the busiest weeks of the year, followed by another week that did not slow down, I feel like I should update you on the 12 girls who descended upon our base for Discipleship Training School (they’re amazing), about the vision strategy meeting where God placed the same issues on each of our hearts (Community begins at home.  With relationship.  Who knew?), about the teams that will be going to Israel, Ethiopia, and Asia this year…but in the middle of rehashing all the details of an update, I realize that if I am bored writing it, my readers will be bored reading it.  And I do not want to bore anyone.  So…that’s your update (for now)…

12 girls for the DTS = amazing

Community begins at home, and we’re working on that this year.  Again.  😉

Israel, Ethiopia, Asia, and who knows where else.

As for me and my heart…

…I have come to the conclusion that I am learning to wait on the Lord.  A week and a half ago I got to teach a little girl to dance in the Spirit…which was basically teaching her how to wait and let Him take the lead.

Yesterday I got to play my violin in worship.  Twice.  Both times I got feedback on how incredible it was…actually, people have been saying that a lot recently…how my skills are really improving and what not.  I’m thinking to myself, “What I am doing right now is waaaaaay less technical than what I was doing when I picked it back up months ago.”

What I am doing differently…is waiting.  Sometimes on a single note.  F#.  F# again.  Still playing F#.  Suddenly a run comes out of nowhere (that’s like a lick, for those of you who specialize in more fretted stringed instruments.)  Sometimes I wait without playing…or without the violin in my hands at all.  I don’t “hear” the part, so I don’t play…and I realize that it works best with what everyone else is doing.

Not that learning to listen in ensemble is anything new to me.  Not that learning to wait is anything new, either.  Just seems to be where I am right now.  And I am feeling incredibly impatient…like standing there with my violin in my hands, thinking, “Why don’t I have anything to play? [pause pause pause] Ooooooooooh…because I’m not supposed to play right now.”  Then I set down the violin and a moment later realize it’s almost my cue.  I haven’t played some of these songs in months, and last time I played it differently.  How, then, do I know it’s almost my cue?  Must be Jesus.  I pick up the violin and play a scale and the whole room erupts into movement and color and life.

I remember when I started learning to dance with God.  I would wait, with my hands open, and breathe.  Just breathe.  And wait.  Pretty soon my arms would know which way to move and my feet would follow the gentle motion.  Learning to wait while playing in a band with a bunch of rock-n-roll worshipers is a bit more…raucous…to say the least.  Not all worshipers are rock-n-roll, but these guys are!  Learning ensemble with them may just be a miracle for this often soft spoken ballerina, and I’m loving it.

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brief update

It seems like it’s been too long again since my last update.  I’d like to get back in the habit of updating during my weekly office hours, but it seems like there is so much that I am doing when I come into the office.  For instance, today I primed a wall which I will be painting on Friday. 

Things are going well with the Outreach department.  We are studying a different sphere of society each week according to the Seven Spheres/Mountains in the teachings of Loren Cunningham and Bill Bright.  These spheres are present in every society, in one form or another.  The Seven Spheres are:

  • Government and Finance
  • Family and Health Care
  • Education
  • Arts, Entertainment, and Sports
  • Media and Communications
  • Science and Technology
  • Church 

For the purposes of study, we split up Government and Finance into two different weeks: government last week and finance/business this week.  Our desire in this time is to get a Biblical understanding of each of these spheres as well as a deeper understanding of how each sphere looks in American culture.  One aspect of the sphere of business is Business as Mission, which I have been researching this week. 

Tomorrow afternoon I will be leading this Bible study/discussion/prayer time.  Friday we are holding a bake sale at Walmart to raise funds for the base overhead costs.  But right now I need to dust the office…because we are, each of us on this base, servant leaders.  🙂

Blessings on your week!

YWAM Pismo Beach Structure

I thought it would be helpful, in my blog post this week, to explain the structure of the base and talk a little about the staff.

Currently, we have thirteen staff at YWAM Pismo:

Will
Lori
Brandon
Kirsten
Lauren
Natasha
Jaque
Cat
Cody
Tyler
Stephanie
Paulina
ME!

Base Ministry:  Our base has 15 departments (also called committees or ministries) that help it run.  These departments cover all the basic needs of the base: physical, financial, communications, administrative, spiritual, etc.  For instance, we need people to make sure we have paper clips, that checks are processed, that the toilet gets cleaned, that bills are paid, that people know about our base, and that we are doing the things we are called to do!  We share these responsibilities by serving within these departments.  Everybody serves in at least three, everybody facilitates at least one.  Some people also have personal ministries, which I can tell more about later.  We try to get all our work done, both for the base and personal ministries, during our work hours.  This just helps to keep us accountable for how we spend our time and also keeps our lives relevant to the culture in which we live.  A little story from yesterday will be a good example of how we all “wear different hats” and how that works together:

Lauren and Cat are both part of our Outreach Department and were going to the store to buy supplies.  I was with them on their errand because I had an errand of my own.  While we were out, I needed to take an hour from our work day for a last-minute appointment.  Lauren is on Guidance Committee (which is like the human resources department) and Cat, being in the Administrative department, is the person who is responsible for tracking time off and time away from base.  They were exactly the people I needed to communicate with!  They put on their administrative hats for a moment, we talked about the business side of what needed to be covered.  It was such a blessing!  Then they put on their supportive ministry friend hats and prayed with me.  Another amazing blessing.

The departments I am on are:

Hospitality
Intercession, Worship, and Spiritual Warfare
Outreach
Staff Development

People also have personal ministries and the base hosts two schools.  I can talk more about those another day.  I  hope this gives you a more clear glimpse into my life at YWAM Pismo Beach.

Delight

I would like to take a moment and clarify some things from last weeks post.

I still work for YWAM.  I have made a two year commitment here, and they have made a two year commitment to me. 

Stepping down from the DTS was in no way disciplinary.  Stephanie, the school leader, sat down with me and through tears said, basically, “What God is doing in your life is more important than my ministry.  I want you to take a break and focus on Him.”  It goes down in history as one of the singularly most loving moments of my life, as Stephanie and the rest of the staff had to step up in the places where I had been serving.  They laid down their lives for me, which the Bible tells us is the test of love, that you would lay down your life for your friends.

If I am slightly vague about what God is doing in my life, it is because I don’t really understand.  I posted a few of the themes that come up repetitively, consistently, across lots of different groups of friends.  It’s okay not to understand completely.  Part of the reason I don’t understand is because He is doing in me something I have not seen, heard, or imagined, and this is good.

When I’m not being swept off my feet by a passionate loving God who wants all of me, I am working (with Him) on my other base ministries. 

  • Staff Development  This is basically “continuing education” for the staff on the base here.  You can see why, since these people have sacrificed so that I can seek the Lord on a deeper level, I would want to sow back into them by arranging speakers, finding sermons, and arranging workshops so that they too can grow in the Lord.I am facilitator. 
  •  House Representative This is a new role for me, but we all take turns.  Remember that the governing structure of our base is a flat leadership structure.  Well, instead of trying to get 13 people together once a week, we have a meeting as a house, and then the house representative goes to meet with the other house representatives at the Operations Meeting.  Confused?  Draw yourself a diagram.  It will make more sense.  Anyway, being the House Rep helps me understand the process better…and believe me…I have lots of questions.
  • In-reach Since we just moved into this house last November, it has taken a lot of work to get our in-reach going.  We have taken time to pray, and currently we are inviting individual families over.  When I was working the DTS, it was almost impossible to devote any time to in-reach.  Now that I have had a couple weeks to process, my ideas and excitement is building.

I’m sure I will do more as time goes on, but at the moment, since my assignment is to “be still”, I am trying to be faithful to that.

Thank you for praying for me this week.  It was a hard week, but it has ended extremely well.  Thursday I got to talk to several lovely people, and today, Saturday, I spent at a prophetic painting workshop hosted by Oasis Church.  I really love the Holy Spirit. 

I lead my first department meeting this week!  I am head of the staff development ministry, and we had our first meeting.  It was short and productive.  🙂 Hurrah!

Below, as promised, the Loren Cunningham talk on Nigeria.  I heard him in Kansas City this last December…you will want to fast forward to 1:58…unless, of course, you want to experience the amazing IHOP worship and Mark Anderson’s talk.

Beth

http://cmp.ihop.tv/pdk/4.1/swf/flvPlayer.swf

T R A N S F O R M A T I O N

Happy Friday!  Today is Fun Day Friday…hopefully I will have pictures for you from our awkward 80’s day.  🙂

The DTS students are fun and hilarious.  I can see how God is growing each one of them, so differently and yet so profound.  It is fun to be on the leadership side of a school, looking for Him as things take shape.  Each of my roles gives me a little window into these magnificent young souls.

The kitchen has had a bit of a rocky start as I figure out what is required of me and then how to delegate, when to delegate, and what to delegate.  The hardest part, though, is that I have to know what needs to be done before I can delegate!  Jesus is teaching me interdependence in just about every area of my life, and this can be seen tangibly in the DTS kitchen.  While figuring out the food prep side of things has been tricky, relationships have been forming and growing in the kitchen…so my goal to feed their hearts as well as their tummies is working out quite nicely.

My small group is made up of three lovely individuals.  As with many of our students, these three are called to leadership specifically in ministry.  Each of them comes with a strong foundation, but I feel that God wants to take them to the next level in knowledge, understanding, and compassion.  They desire to be challenged.  Please pray for me as I seek God’s heart and will for them as their leader.

God has been reminding me of all the things I have learned in the last 10-20 years.  It is easy to forget that I have so many resources within me.  This last year of my life has been so transformational, and yet my students need all of me, all that I am, all the paths I have walked.  A silly example of this is today for Fun Day…I am in charge of coming up with games to play.  I was laying awake last night, thinking to myself, “Eek!  Egad!  I didn’t plan any games.  I should have looked some crazy games up online.  I bet if I did a google search…”  God interrupts, “How about Improv. games?”  Suddenly I remember all of the games I have learned and lead over the last 15 years.  “Oh, yeah, there is a wealth of information and experience within me.  I have been equipped for every task God has for me.”  I need to remember.  It’s good to remember.

Cocooning  The DTS season has been way more intense than I anticipated.  My church began 2010 with a 21 day Daniel fast, and this fast set things in motion within me, a season which is best defined by the transformation of a caterpillar into a butterfly.  Check out this article  on About.com and scroll down to the Pupa Stage.  Things I noticed…the chrysalides looks like it is resting, but there is a LOT going on inside.  The little caterpillar, which spent most of it’s life eating, is now fasting (like me).  Stillness is important to transformation (Be still and know that I AM God…).  God activates something within the caterpillar, something amazing that was always there, and this initiates the destruction of the caterpillar’s old body (my flesh is dying and being destroyed).  The entire body of the caterpillar is destroyed.  This process has two names…programmed cell death or histogenesis, (histo=tissue; genesis=beginning).  It is an end and a beginning.  I asked God when this season will be over.  I believe He said, “You will know.”  🙂  Just like the butterfly, I will rest here until some change in light or some change within, calls me on.  I hope it’s before we leave on Outreach.


Our outreach locations will be: Nigeria and Russia!  The entire staff got to pray with the students, and there may be another location for the Russia team.  I will be assisting Paulina, who is leading the Nigeria outreach.  I am sooooooooooooo excited.  I will try to post Loren Cunningham’s talk from the One Thing conference later this week.


Be blessed, my friends!

Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect. Romans 12:2

DTS…week one

The new students are here.  It has been an intense week.  The students are amazing individuals.  I am remembering back to my first week of DTS…begging God to hold me together as my life took on new shape, trying to find how I fit in this new world and how my new world fit in me. 

I find myself back in Colossians this week, “He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn of all creation.  For by him all things were created in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities–all things were created through him and for him.  And he is before all things, and in him all things hold together.” (1:15-17)

I am reminded that He is big enough to hold all these lovely students together, to hold my heart, to hold this school and all the dreams He has for us.  He is Holy, and we can trust Him. 

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